Monday, February 2, 2015

LADY FRIENDS

Do you believe males and females can be just friends?

This was a topic for conversation several times in my marriage.  Both marriages.  One husband thought no problem!  The other .. very uncomfortable because he did not think it was possible.  Maybe because we were friends (with sexual tension, I suppose) first. 

Now I notice that even more.  I have two male friends.  My UNson-in-law and my buddy from 25 years ago, Eli.  Eli's daughter and our daughter were the best of friends for many, many years.  When he and his wife divorced, we stayed in touch with both of them.  He is/was very comfortable being a threesome with us.  Weekly, almost.

For Valentine's Day this year I suggested to one of my South Maui Merry Widows that we should go to a romantic French restaurant in Lahaina.  So far we have EIGHT of us, and one husband willing to brave that harem.

Maybe I'm just old fashioned in my thinking but I'm not comfortable making friendships with a single man.  (Except Eli but he has a fabulous lady friend I adore).  I do not want sexual tension.  

I really do enjoy my lady friends!  With a group of fun and enthusiastic friends ...


Or just two buddies sharing wine and camaraderie ...



Or just one for coffee and conversation!




6 comments:

  1. I fully believe that a man and a woman can just be friends without sexual tension between them. Maybe not every man or every woman is capable of viewing the opposite sex as just another friend but the vast majority of us are. We just don't get the chance all that often because their is usually a jealous partner/spouse who doesn't like it.

    Love your Valentine's Day plans!

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    1. I'm still on the fence with this. Altho to be fair, I haven't tried to make friends with any males. Yet.

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  2. I always thought so because I had many male friends when I was in high school, but...it didn't work after I was married. It seemed eventually, the male friend would want a more familiar relationship. Now that I'm older and most of the time sex doesn't even enter the thought processes, I think it is possible. My daughter Pammie had the perfect male friends relationship with two guys--who live together and are gay. All three enjoy their time together. I'd like to find a male gay friend--I think that would work great!

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    1. I, too, need some gay friends!

      In the past, any male friendship eventually morphed into him wanting more than conversation. Stay tuned. Maybe old age WILL remove that factor of sexual tension ...

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  3. I never know the answer to this question. Maybe it isn't an either/or situation. Sometimes, maybe. Other times, no.

    Judy's got it right. Gay guys make the best friends!

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    Replies
    1. You are right. I'll be doing scientific research on this topic!

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