Sunday, January 26, 2014

CONTROL ISSUES

Right after Mr. Ralph died, I scheduled Maui Closet Co. to revamp our two tiny reach in master closets.  We got the design and quote over a year ago and I just had to numbly proceed.  This made it easier for me to donate his clothing since I had to empty both closets (and paint) in preparation.  No reliving memories or a pity party while softly stroking those well worn t-shirts ... just rushed right through it!

This past week I had the guest closet done.  Mainly for storage for some of my less used kitchen appliances ... while still offering space for visitors.




Everything is looking more organized around here.  In fact, I can't wait to get to the Portland condo and give it more of my personality.  My favorite widowhood blogger,The Misadventures of Widowhood, at: 


is also into getting her closets (and her home) orderly and more efficient.  She has the advantage of some cold and snowy weather keeping her indoors, but I'm wondering now if this nesting is really about something else.

Are we trying to feel like we have control over some small part of our new lives?  Because we have no control over our grief?  In my case, I do think this is the case.  Starting a project, no matter how small, and then finishing it gives me some real satisfaction these days.  Most things are not that big of a deal but I feel a bit happier once they are done.

Yep.  I think I have control issues.








2 comments:

  1. It shouldn't come to as any surprise that I haven't organized my closet since the day we moved in 12 years ago...until this week. I've been a clothes hoarder and still am judging by how much I kept. I hope to make the purging project a yearly thing, though. You bring up an interesting theory on the nesting thing all being part of trying to get control over our lives, after a spouse died. More truth than fiction in that theory, I think. It could also have a healthy dose of busy work, too, to get our minds off other stuff. Widows all seem to go through a stage where we re-decorate and reorganize. I just accept it and try not too look too deeply into the reasons.

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  2. Yep. No deep thinking on my part! Barely ANY thinking. Busy hands do help make a happy widow!

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