Thursday, August 7, 2014

AWKWARD CRYING ...

Janet and I made a lot of progress in the junk room.  A load to Goodwill, a load to the dumpster and lots of things put into their own space.  Three or four more days like that and the room will become an office again.

I didn't realize how much crying would be involved.  

We have lots of doo dads which collect dust as well as look interesting, so I made some tough decisions to get rid of some.  Every once in a while, I would say no ... not my style ... but Mr. Ralph really loved that ... no, set it free.  Then we noticed he had etched his Social Security number onto the bottom!  He was saying YES, keep that one!  And so I did.

His photo popped up several times which made my heart ache to have him back.  I guess he will just always be here with me.  And every once in a while he will show himself.  I can cry and love him and miss him.  Although my sister and I have had quite a few laughs about irritating husband habits this week!  

What made me even sadder was coming across notes from AlAnon and family counselors and personal counselors and group counselors on dealing with addiction.  It shocked me to realize how long this has been affecting my life.  Right now I have some serious concerns about my little family.  If my suspicions are true, I have some difficult work ahead of me.  I have to turn my mothering gene off.



Nothing I have done has "worked" or "helped" so this time I do nothing.  Sink or swim.

2 comments:

  1. I'm glad your sister was there to help you with the emotional side of downsizing as well as the hands-on aspects. I am well past the tears that come with downsizing but it's still an issue I deal with and probably will for some time to come---I'm on another break right now from eBaying.

    Hope you're suspicions are wrong but with the length of time you've dealt with the issue, you're probably not. Find some support for you, while you apply the sink or swim principle where needed.

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  2. Well done. I'm sure it was tough at times. It's good that your sister offered a helping hand. You probably feel better now that it's done. I always feel lighter after these type of projects.

    I, too, hope you are wrong. I've had similar issues with family members. Almost every family seems to be plagued nowadays.

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