Tuesday, September 23, 2014

IT HURTS UNTIL IT DOESN'T

My neighbor has been a widow for over thirty years.  Yes, she still misses him and her heart aches.  I hope I never forget my guy.



This second year of widowhood is not as intense as that first year.  I was almost one of those wailing in the streets kinda widow.  Everything was bigger than imaginable.  I'm pleased to learn that this year the ups are still high and the lows are more bearable.  This I can manage.  Hopefully.

Right now I'm sad and missing him like crazy.  It's our first rainy day ... the day we would start getting excited to head to Maui.  One year we left for our island in early November but I wanted to come back for Christmas.  My gosh it poured rain the entire 2-3 weeks we were in Portland and EVERY time we went outside he'd remark "why are we here" again.  Then he'd pull out a photo of Braeden, or a cute video, and then he would sigh... "that's why."

I'm moving towards the stage of grief where most of the annoying things are floating to the background of my memory.  Some of the once annoying things now are kinda cute.  

It's hard to believe that our anniversary this month would mark 30 years!  Thirty years!  Who would have thunk it!

6 comments:

  1. Hard to believe so much gets accomplished without our guys around. We women are one strong sex, aren't we?!

    Happy 30th anniversary, AW.

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    1. Widows are especially Amazon Women who must be strong. Sheesh! Maybe we should nominate one day a month for not being strong. Pampering, junk food and movie bingeing

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  2. Hope you have more sweet than bittersweet memories when you think of your anniversary. 30 years is a long time to be together! The changing of seasons brings a lot of memories for all of us, I think. How could they not? Change is the keynote speaker in widowhood land.

    When are you going back to Maui this yeara?

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    1. Changes! I think you are right on the money.

      I will celebrate New Year's Eve in Maui!

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  3. Happy Anniversary! Here's to sweet memories.

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  4. Remember back to those early married days? Gosh--it was hard getting to know each other. Sometimes, even after 25 years, it was still hard at times to figure each other out. I have friends who have been married 57 years and still haven't become friends. The upcoming Holidays are the hardest for us, but....we always make it through because we are stronger than anyone realizes!

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