Yep, I'm still in Portland and tonight I got together with some fabulous ladies ... most of whom I met playing Bunco (which I hate). We did NOT play Bunco but shared some wine, some conversation and a few tidbits. We sat sort of in a circle around a coffee table in my condo clubhouse room, so I asked each friend to catch me up on her life.
WOW! Loss, love and laughter. New grandchildren. Downsizing. Still employed. Retirement. A small stroke. Travel. New love (she's been a widow for four years!). I am simply in awe of having these friendships. Several for over thirty years.
Two others are also widows. I loved hearing how they muddled their own ways. What journeys we have. But now I feel more confident that I will survive. Somehow. It's just a lot of perseverance.
It is still so awkward for me. It is still so new. So raw. So sad. So lonely. So empty. I feel like I am just taking baby steps but at least they are steps.
It's maybe be hard and awkward but you've got the right attitude. You will survive and one day thrive again. You're already ahead of the game just knowing that change has to come from within.
ReplyDeleteJean, I am SOOOOO glad I stumbled upon your blog. You have inspired me. Not only in this widowhood stuff (and that it's OK to laugh!) but also to begin to write my blog. I've never kept a diary or journal or anything. Ever. But this blog thing just is a nice hobby for me! I look forward to making time to write! Even if it doesn't happen every day!!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your long distance e-friendship! I hope we meet in person some day!