WHEN I JUST CAN'T ....

As my life continues to move at this nice slow pace, sometimes my blogging ideas aren't interesting enough.  So photos today for your viewing pleasure!

Mr. Eagle Eyes (age 8.5) is always finding things 

around the complex.  The Owner was so impressed, 

she gave him the sweetest card and a bug catching kit.  

They put his picture in our monthly newsletter.

They were searching for dance music and came upon a Weird Al Yancovic song about "fat boys" .... they took it literally

I love looking at all these Maui pictures.  Sorry 

(not really) if they bore you.

Yes, he got three golf lessons for Christmas .. 

through our local Parks and Rec center.  LOVED them!

I love how the photographer captured this moment.

Momma and her Firstborn

BUSIER THAN A ...

Mr. Ralph had some pretty funny analogies for when he was busy.  All 100 employees have heard them 100 times, I'm sure.

Busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest (his favorite)
Busier than a one armed wallpaperer
Busier than a mosquito at a nudist colony
Busier than a rooster in a hen house.

And so on. Google "busier than a" and see many, many more!

Sometimes people ask me what I do all day.  In sort of a negative way.  First of all, what is wrong with doing nothing?  After racing around for YEARS investing time and effort into loving my husband, working full time or part time, raising a child, volunteering, caring for a dog and/or a cat, keeping house, entertaining, etc. I rather enjoy moving at a very slow pace. Some days I spend 45 minutes meditating (or napping) ticking off my list of "remember that day in June 1987 when I was up all night with a little one starting an earache".

I probably spend more time doing a task than before, because I have the time.  When you're in a hurry you can fold a load of laundry in ten minutes.  Now I enjoy the process (kinda Marie Kondo style), folding purposefully, smoothing the wrinkles, sorting by person.  It takes me 10-15 minutes to make my bed these days.

As I age, I no longer multi-task...although today I did.  SOOOO busy.  Turned on the self cleaning oven.  Backed up my hard drive.  

I also installed my Hickie shoe fasteners.  Spent an hour with some kitties I am caring for.  Read what I wanted from the NY Times.  Filled my week long vitamin caddy.  Lost three games of Word Streak.  Played three games of LetterPress.  Walked 2,000 steps on purpose, another 1,500 just living in this tiny space.  Signed up for Defensive Driving (I couldn't get the online version to work ... and it's FOUR hours so I would get bored and procrastinate).  Made a doctor appt (no easy task some days!)

Spring Break for the boys starts at noon tomorrow.  I spent some time finding family things for them to do that are affordable (does your library have cultural passes you can borrow?  Amazing opportunities ... art museum, Japanese Garden, Oregon Historical Society and more). 

And now ...

Don't forget the time sucking Facebook.  It's how I socialize daily with family and friends and a few comic relief pages.  I try to put a colorful greeting for birthdays or anniversaries or congrats.  I'm getting more vocal with local issues.

Here I am ... dinner time!

AWKWARD AGING

It's happening more and more.  Adjusting my life to accommodate aging.  Yesterday I bought a set of Corelle dishes ... just like my Mom had.

Before we downsized, I had so many sets of dishes.  Service for 8 in black, service for 8 in white (and loved mixing and matching them), my Mom's china, pasta set for 10, two sets of Christmas dishes (first set from my mother-in-law) and my everyday Dansk.  Can you tell we liked to entertain?  I think I was famous for my table settings.

The Dansk dishes are getting chipped and I worry where that glass goes?  I don't want anyone to accidentally swallow it.  Nor do I want it to damage the old dishwasher.  These dishes are heavy.  And they got heavier every day.  Hard for the boys to carry them to the kitchen after eating ... they usually have to use two hands per item, so it took two or even three trips.

The Corelle is amazingly light!  I can hold 5 large dinner plates the way I hold 1 large Dansk dinner plate.  I bought only the right sizes of items that we would use.  It's been very helpful not wasting food!  The boys and I use the lunch size for almost every meal.  The parents (young with great metabolism) use the 10 1/2" inch dinner plate.  Two sizes of bowls as well.

Last week I took the AARP Safe Driving course.  I learned a lot of tips there about compensating.  It is now recommended that you hold the steering wheel at 8 and 4 rather than 10 and 2.  Senior drivers seem to oversteer (like if a squirrel runs out in front) which causes more accidents.   Using the lower hand position lessens the amount of turn.

Portland is a big bicycle town.  It was suggested that we open our driver car door with our RIGHT hand, as many bike/car accidents are bikes running into sudden opening of car doors.  Try that out.  To do it, your body turns to the left and it forces you to look out further to the left prior to opening.  If you haven't taken this $15 class (6 hours!), I highly recommend it.  You might even get a discount on your car insurance!

Now I always bring at least two reusable bags with me and if I'm not doing self check out, I ask the check out person to pack them with the weight divided equally ... instead of one big heavy bag.  Which helps a lot as the boys are being trained to come help bring in my purchases.

My sister gave me an idea to practice balance .. while brushing my teeth!  It's getting better and better.  I'm consciously standing straighter after seeing photos of me looking like a slump frump.  Haven't lost any height yet! 5' 7" of Gramma!

My daughter gave me advice on making my walking shoes into slip on walking shoes (they will not let me get velcro until I'm 90).  Having two little guys who are always changing shoes, they've tried different kinds and like Hickies the best.  We take shoes off in the house, I and HATE tie shoes.  I have to sit to tie or untie ... which would be easier if I lost some weight in my tummy area!  Ugh.

 


These things come in so many colors and sizes.  Depending on number of grommets on your shoes (kids of course are different in size than adult due to width).

I think I should really call this blog Aging Gracefully.  Any little changes for the better!

AND THE VERDICT IS ...

Today I went to my Dr to ask about my coughing and snoring.  I feel much better now.  My prognosis is excellent ... I don't appear to have lung cancer or fatal sleep apnea.

He's a young guy (we used to call him Doogie Howser) so probably 40 or so now.  Charming, personable, great listener and goes for the least amount of medicine or intrusion.  He looked through my file and reminded me I came in for these same two complaints last year, at different times.  I forgot all about both of them!

Sleep apnea first.  He has a written 0-3 scoring sheet with about 10 questions.  Unless you get a 10 out of 10, he thinks home remedies are the way to go.  Last year I had a 2.  This year I had a 3.  Guess what my fellow blogger, The Misadventures of Widowhood!  He suggested the item you have mentioned!

While I was answering the questionnaire, he looked at my week's worth of sleep logs.  Another reason I like him ... he's a gadget guy.  He suggested using a cool air humidifier.  Which may also help the coughing.  Using Flonase twice a day might help as well, and again this could help with the coughing (which he thinks is caused by sinus discharge .... most likely slight seasonal allergies).

I have been taking an antihistamine every morning which helps a ton with the coughing.  (I thanked him for not saying "well, at your age, this is quite common").  He promised he would never say that!  I have been feeling tired most days recently and he thinks the antihistamine might be the cause of that.  The BEST reason to stop doing that.

Now to get everything and continue using my SleepBot app.  If I don't notice an improvement, I can give him a call and he will send a referral to an ENT.  The coughing IS better .. I didn't take the antihistamine this morning so he could see the real me.  Only coughed once during our 20 minutes.

And that, folks, is the rest of the story.  Verdict "NO WORRIES" is in!

NO SHAME

Yesterday afternoon a condo neighbor popped over for a visit.  She said she hadn't seen me for years ... wanted to be sure I was alive.

I have really backed away from the gossip social community here as well as the politics.  My focus is on being part of this thriving family, being neighborly (enough), and giving back to my community.

Having Sylvia visit did my heart good.  When I first moved in here, I was embarrassed to have anyone come inside.  Now I am not.  She is 80 and has no social filter (passive aggressive?).  She just blurts out whatever.

We have children's books everywhere.  Into a bookshelf each evening.  We have a large freezer in our dining room so we can shop the sales and Costco.  We have a huge monitor on the dining room table so they can watch educational shows (Mr. Nye the Science guy, PBS Kids or an age appropriate movie) while having a snack or a meal.  Mostly they watch the birds out the window as Kate has five bird feeders and a squirrel feeder.

Her first comment was "wow, I had to go through an obstacle course to get to your front door". 

My reply "Isn't it great that those boys can have fun with things other than toys?  Deacon got a book for his birthday called The Stick Book with ideas and directions to make things out of sticks.  Braeden reads it, they go stick hunting and then make things.

From Sylvia:  Are YOU sick too?
From Me:  Nope!
From Sylvia: Oh, you are still in your cute pajamas.
From Me:  Yes, and I may just stay in them all day!  No hot water this morning!  Jesse is trying to fix it to save calling a plumber.  (yes, mission accomplished!  AND, Judy, he drained it and cleaned it out as well)
From Judy:  Oh well ... could he do ours?
From Me:  Yes, if he is able!  $30/hour.

From Sylvia:  You let your dog on the furniture, there's a dog bed right beside him!
From Me:  He is a lucky boy.  He's old and prefers that love seat so we accommodate him by putting a blanket over it.

Deacon was home sick with a cold, so he decided to entertain us ... he brought out his small pop up tent, a tunnel, 101 stuffed animals and a few blankets.  He did a pretty good job of NOT interrupting us, but he did join in a few times.  I was listening to him with half an ear and he was playing school with them.

From Sylvia:  Aren't you supposed to play in your room?  Like a good boy?
From Me:  We let them play wherever their imagination takes them!  We are raising kids, not a museum or even "good boys"  We are raising critical thinking people.  They are professionals and put everything away before they start a new project.

From Sylvia:  I sure see them running around in all parts of the complex without an adult.  Isn't that dangerous?
From Me:  When I was growing up, we roamed all the time.  I'm so glad we live in a small community so they can do the same.  I'm sure any neighbor would give us a call if there was any kind of problem.

From Sylvia:  Well, they sure are noisy out there.
From Me:  Isn't that great that they know the difference between inside voices and outside voices?  I bet you noticed that in your children.  And I love how the parents get them outside EVERY day, rain or shine, to exercise their bodies.  If it's really rainy, they set up an obstacle course in the clubhouse room.  Or they have a nerf gun battle.  

After about an hour of "conversation", Deacon came up to Sylvia and touched her arm and said "it's time for you to go now, brubba is coming home and we have a special date with Momma"

She got the most startled look on her face, but did get up and go.

P.S.  The chaos WOULD bother a lot of people, but I have compromised and adapted to living in a small space with lots of people.  Freezer and fridge are covered in artwork.  The hallway has a narrow metal strip where they can attach special things with magnets.  Every horizontal surface has knick knacks that mean a lot to each of them.  My room is my serene sanctuary.

HOW MANY HOOPS ARE THERE?

Volunteering is such an admirable hobby.  For some people, it involves more hours than a full time job.  My first job is here with the kids.  If they get accepted into Montessori, I will be a bus driver twice a day (kinda hoping Jesse will get his license) and it's about a 20 minute drive.  In between 8:30 and 3:30, I can spare some time.

When Kate was in school, I was a volunteer in her class.  At least twice a week.  In junior high and high school, she didn't even want to acknowledge me, so I worked behind the scenes.  I still had my weekly visits with our "adopted" grandparents.  When Ralph retired, I retired from volunteering until we got into our new groove.

I was a volunteer drive in Maui after he died.  Now I'd like to drive once or twice a week for our Adult Community Center and/or our new grassroots WLLO Village (West Linn Lake Oswego).  Things are sure different now.

First I took a four hour class for the LOACC (Lake Oswego Adult Community Center)(January I think).  They then asked for a Criminal background test complete with fingerprints.  Got that done in early February.  I've left several messages for the Volunteer Coordinator who has never returned my calls or sent an email (this is now March).

WLLO requires so many more hoops!  And of course, they will not use the previous background check.  They use a company elected by the National Villages movement, Verified Volunteers, and when I got the A-OK back from them, I also had it sent to LOACC hoping to jog someone into action to give me a job!  (They posted on FB they are in dire need of drivers!).

Yesterday I completed the day long AARP Smart Driver Course.  Neither organization asks for that in particular but I sent it to them anyway.  I had to scan in my drivers license, front and back, my insurance card front and back as well as a two page application to be a volunteer driver ... and sent them to the WLLO coordinator.

Now, to continue this process, WLLO has to get a DMV check.  Their application asked for traffic citations, month and year (I just said it's been 15 years ... don't remember the dates)  

Next, there are two videos I need to watch and take an online quiz after ... a Blood Borne Pathogen online video (only about 25 minutes). The Defensive Driving class is long but you can stop and restart anytime along the way (she said cheerfully).

And then an actual driving test!  Stay tuned.

P.S.  The AARP class is really good!  Only $15 if you are a member.  We had a great leader, lots of short videos and an awesome booklet to refresh our memories.  You may even get an insurance discount.  I highly recommend.

FINISHING TOUCHES

The Maui house officially belongs to Father Jim.

My realtor called to tell me that four nieces and nephews chipped in to buy their uncle a retirement home.  He is the retired priest at the Catholic church about a mile from Kawailani Circle.  He, of course, was overwhelmed and loved the fact he didn't have to go out and buy a thing.  Move in ready!  It is nice to know the new story.

Once I saw that the money was deposited into my account, I started closing down accounts ... internet, tv, electric, water, trash etc.  Originally the realtor said she would do that but when I verified with her yesterday ... she said "ooops!  I forgot!  They no longer let realtors make the changes."

Naturally, no one would let me close accounts online.  Had to make a phone call.  Cable wanted to send me to "customer relations" to try to talk me into keeping everything but I learned to say "moving off island" and that saves me listening to a sales pitch.  It snowed most of the day yesterday while I'm talking to Hawaiians who have only seen snow up on the mountain.

Anyway, everything was accomplished.  I hope Fr  Jim enjoys his time at Kawailani Circle.  Just enough maintenance to keep him puttering around.  I wish I had contact with him.  When I think of things (keep the outdoor shower door latched against the wall when not in use ... or it will blow off of the hinges) I'd like to be able to let him know.  I did send a few helpful hints to my realtor so I hope he receives them.

Jesse got everything fertilized and pruned before we left.  I forgot to tell Realtor that the lemon tree needs neem oil or inground neem application once a month to keep the white flies away.  Oh, and the rose of sharon and gardenias also.

Hopefully Fr Jim will enjoy his coffee or tea outdoors every morning.  I smile just thinking about that.

WAIT. WHAT? MARCH????

While it is still COLD, the sun has been bright the past few days and predicted to remain sunny all week!

Mr. Deacon turns FIVE today!  What a little man he has become.  Still a scamp and a whirling dervish, yet kindness remains.  He's becoming a little more physically affectionate and loves books, army guys, Legos and anything camo.  He's become a whiz on his two wheeler.  

The most exciting madness we are starting this month .... being on a budget!  I'm putting Jesse in charge of groceries and take out treats.  It just seems we have so much waste.  Cereal goes stale, greens wilt, and leftovers need to be dated.  I will clean out the fridge on grocery day.  He will plan the menus and make the list.  When I first moved back, they were on food assistance from the State.... less than $400 per month.  I'm being very generous and starting out with $200 per week.  It sounds like a giant sum of money but will include toiletries as well.  Breakfast is always at home.  Boys take packed lunches.  I've been treating to take out food 5-7 times a month.  

We are tightening the cash flow so we can send the boys to Montessori school in the fall.  Braeden is so shy/anxious and rarely volunteers to answer in class, even though he knows the answer.  Deacon is totally bored in preK and needs a challenge that HE is interested in.  I fell in love with this type of teaching when I was in high school and read the book Summerhill, which is about a learn through play style without grades.  I was one of those students who got great grades but not for the sake of learning ... just pleasing people with my grades.

Kate was originally more interested in the Waldorf system.  I was more in favor of Montessori because of some of their graduates and their achievements.

MONTESSORI

Many parents choose Montessori because they believe it helps their children acquire leadership skills and independence in general.  Kids work at whatever level they are working at. You don’t organize the room according to a specific age, but by a certain topic of discovery.  Montessori students typically become high achieving lovers of learning. 

WALDORF

This play-based approach is characterized by a predictable structure, providing children with a dependable routine, such as certain days of the week for set activities like baking or gardening, as well as mixed-age classrooms with the same teacher for multiple years. “There is an emphasis on creative learning, reading, singing, acting … It’s great for kids who want that predictability, but there is creativity there. It’s a blend

But NO technology.  None.  Which turned me off immediately.  So easy to go in depth on a topic via the internet.

FAMOUS MONTESSORI GRADUATES

• Larry Page and Sergey Brin – founders of Google
• Jeff Bezos – founder of Amazon.com
• Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis – former first lady (John F. Kennedy)
• Sean ‘P.Diddy’ Combs – singer
• Prince William and Prince Harry
• T. Berry Brazelton – pediatrician and author
• Julia Child – author, chef, TV cooking shows
• Elizabeth Berridge – actress
• Kami Cotler – actress
• Melissa and Sarah Gilbert – actors
• Gabriel Garcia Marquez – Nobel Prize winner for Literature
• Katherine Graham – ex-owner of the Washington Post
• Anne Frank – author, diarist from World War II

It's nice to have a dream/goal.  Which is being encouraged by my financial planner.  My five year old trust leaves any of my leftover money 70% for the boys education.  Why not watch them flourish while I am here???

And yes, I have to have my will and other such legal stuff re-done in Oregon.  What happened to the days where I could just write it on paper and put it in an envelope "open upon my death"?