DAYS of WINE and ROSES

Since I started blogging in 2013, I have happened upon some other very interesting blogs.  Several have to do with money and finances and living on a budget.  I must honestly say I have never followed a budget.  Whatever my income, I/we usually stayed within.  There were a few lean years where we did not pay off credit card(s) each month but it didn't take long to get that back under control.  

This past year I have lovingly supported this whole little family.  What a gift it was for all of us!  Everyone has flourished in so many ways.  We enjoyed several vacations together and that is always a big treat to me.  Growing up, we went camping as a vacation.  And we got to eat out at a medium priced Chinese restaurant.  Mr. Ralph taught me about vacations and travel.  I still thank him.  I'm usually the budget conscious person and would NOT have spent that money.  But gosh the memories I have!  I am one lucky little corn fed girl from Ohio.

The young lady who manages the stock market stuff sent me an email today to be sure I wasn't spazzing out over the current volatility.  While I don't "watch" the news or check each stock or bond, I do keep informed.  My "worth" has increased since the last election but I realize it has been too fast and not very realistic.  I let her company buy and sell and I rarely even research each transaction.  Many years ago I formed an all female investment club which lasted for ten years and did tremendously well.  It was easier as we invested just $50 per month.  Mr. Ralph updated his spreadsheet EVERY DAY but I no longer do that.  Stocks just stress me.  Emotionally, I get concerned I will not have enough to get me through to that last day.  It's not really a possibility at this point, but I still worry.

Despite the market craziness, I think I will be doing okay this coming year.  The kidults are both heading back to work and I am charging rent and groceries and they will be responsible for any of their other expenses (did I mention they both SMOKE???).  I'll probably help out with the boys (school, clothes, shoes, sports, etc).

I DO know how to cut more expenses should my good fortune decline.

SCHOOL YEAR 2019-2010

The family is trying to eke out a bit more summer vacation before school starts the day after Labor Day. They went fishing.  They are going rafting (supposed to be 100 degrees)  Working on one last camping trip but being Labor Day, I don't think they have much chance.

Sunstone Montessori school has activities once or twice each week til school starts.  This really helps get the "new" kids involved. Parents are very involved as well.  In fact, they have to invest 15 hours each year... in any number of ways!  So many committees ... providing snacks, helping fundraise, babysitting classroom pets over breaks, helping in the library, etc.

Even picking up dog poop (the school has a huge grassy area and irresponsible pet owners make this a daily job).

This week it is Braeden's visit to his classroom and to meet his teacher.  Also a big clean up of the whole property before school actually starts.  It's amazing what a spruce up can do!  I worked at Kate's preschool for a few years.  They were open year round for child care.  The first year, I asked if I could put out new bark chips, clean the parking lot and have a pot of bright cheerful flowers at the door. over Labor Day weekend.  The owner reluctantly agreed (money is tight) and Mr. Ralph and I did all the work.  Every single full time parent noticed the difference and commented to the owner.  A fresh start to a new school year!

Sunstone doesn't open for school until the day after Labor Day.  Each day the new children attend, just a few at a time.  I think Braeden doesn't go until Thursday.  Deacon the week after!  It gives the experienced students time to welcome two or three new kids to their space and everyone gets to know each other's names, show them the lay of the land, etc.

I bought new 3 compartment bento style boxes for their lunch.  They get to pack their own the night before!  AND it has to include protein, fruit and vegetable.  But they can choose.  Montessori is very strict about keeping processed food out of the lunch area. They do offer school lunch 3 days a week as well as an OOPS my kid forgot his lunch and for $5 they can have a sunflower seed butter and honey sandwich, a piece of cheese and a fruit.  The school lunches would not interest these two guys (yet?)  They are $9.

The most fun will be watching the parents get up at 7am to feed them and help them get ready.  They will drive them the first week and I will most likely volunteer for the morning drive.  We need to leave at 7:55 as they have social time starting at 8:10 and class begins at 8:30.

WORKING IN RETIREMENT

It's been a whirlwind of work with WLLO Village.  I love it.

I'm learning new software.  Most Villages use Club Express to manage memberships, volunteers and service requests.  But it is very old school and cumbersome to learn.  Each time I want to get a report, I have to ask the Chair to grant me permission.  She is still learning also!  Slow but sure.

When a member requests a ride, you can tell CE to only send it to drivers who have agreed ahead of time to certain times or days, weekends or not, evening, etc.  If you tell the Chair when you are on vacation, CE will not even send you a request!  I do like learning how to use it. To keep costs down the first year or two, volunteers are manning the "office".  We have a Google phone number that sends the message via email ... to whichever person is working as office staff that day.  Incredible?  I sure think so.  The office person will then contact Transportation or whomever or call the person to deal with questions over the phone.  No one would ever know we don't have a REAL office.

I'm the Facebook post person.  The more you post, the more often Facebook will show your page.  My goal is to post at least once a day, usually more.  One is a helpful article and one is a funny.  Facebook lets me see how many people "viewed" the post and how many "engaged" (opened up the article). 

May I ask all of my readers who are Facebook users to "like" the West Linn Lake Oswego Village page?  I get brownie points for that.

The Village also use G Suite, Google's integrated productivity apps like word processing, spreadsheets, etc.  Even a Facetime option!  Each leadership person has their own drive and each "team" also has a drive.  We are still learning to SHARE documents so others can manipulate your data or document for their own use.  Once you finish or work on a document, you can choose to send each member on that team a notice.  So much easier than trying to remember who is on what committee and then email them the document.  Edits are in real time so you know you always have the latest version.

The Governing Council invited me to join them so now it is 13 in number instead of the 12 apostles.  WOW are these people working hard behind the scenes.  Last night was my first meeting and I volunteered to be the scribe.  Currently members are invited but starting in April each opening will be voted on by the whole membership.

Earlier this summer I was asked to be the Activities Leader.  Next to transportation, socializing is the most often requested service.  The Chair gave me names of people she thought might be interested in helping and after ONE meeting ... each person volunteered to lead a group!  Book Club, Art Group, Breakfast Out, Flick Friends, Happy Hour, Lunch Group to start.  Most of these will be "especially for Members" (polite term for Members Only).  Happy Hour and Lunch will be open as we would like to entice more members.

There is so much more but we had an HOA Annual Meeting tonight (Weds), so I'm going to stop here and enjoy my glass of red wine!

ROGUE and ROWDY

Four days and three nights the parents were away.  Oh!  The things we did.

One of the days, a WLLO member needed a ride to Fred Meyer.  I contacted her ahead of committing to say I would need to bring the boys but they are usually well behaved.  She agreed.  She brought them each a little bag of chocolate covered graham crackers and the comic section of a few Sunday newspapers.  They were ECSTATIC!  We spent a good 90+ minutes and got a few more school outfits.  And yet another Call of Duty action figure.

 (One is a rapper and the other is a preppie)

My WLLO member was duly impressed when the boys each carried in a bag for her and I got the other two. They really are pretty good kids.  Yes, they are spoiled but they are not rotten.

We are teaching them how much energy goes in to having a family home.  They emptied the trash and recycling every day.  Together they empty the dishwasher.  One washed the dining table and gave it a Pledge promise.  Mr. 5 cleaned the bathroom vanity and mirror.  He was very proud of his accomplishment and scolded us "don't get it all dirty in here again ... that was hard work."  (hee hee ... wait til he gets to wash the toilet and the floor next time).

One afternoon when it was time for dishwasher duty ... the little scoundrels pulled out some Easter "coupons"

They giggled and giggled as I sighed and whined and loudly did their chore.

Mostly they are pretty good about cleaning up the living room before dessert.  Mr. 5 was extra tired one day and didn't want to help.  Mr. Thinks He's a Parent said "set the timer, Gramma, set the timer!" because he knows it stresses the younger one.  But he did it anyway.  With tears in his big blues, Mr. 5 started picking up.  I suggested that we race and we would see who is faster.  He giggled and it got done.  Then he turned to me and said "what is YOUR chore, Gramma?" and I said I clean the table and set it for breakfast, then do the dishes and clean the kitchen.  "Well.  Tell me when you start so I will set the timer and see how YOU like it".

I really spoiled them ... I let them pick Twinkies and SnoBalls for dessert one night.  They have NEVER had that junk before.  Loved it!

Right before the parents left, we sold the old bed set up (not really designed as a two person bunk bed)

It was like the pic above when Mr. 8 was little, then we flipped it so he was on top bunk and it was a little clubhouse underneath.  When Deacon came along, he slept on a crib mattress on the bottom, then we got a real twin mattress 

and Braeden wanted the bottom.

Now they have a trundle bed so parents no longer rip their fingernails or bump their heads when changing the sheets!

TOO TIRED THURSDAY

Well, I have succeeded in keeping the boys busy and happy and tuckered out.  They went to sleep at 8pm tonight!  Of course I am even more tired!

We've been to the pool every afternoon.  I wait til 4pm so I don't have to lather on the sunscreen as the pool is mostly shaded by then.  They still love to bring toys!  The parents don't usually let them because it's a process to get them to gather everything up and carry everything back.  But Gramma's have way more patience.

We finally visited the "authentic" Hawaii shave ice shop about 15 minutes from home.  It was 89 degrees today and they were quite cooling.  Over 50 flavors and up to 3 flavors on a dish ... you can imagine how long that took!  I had orange creamsicle ... with a tiny scoop of vanilla ice cream in the middle.

Tuesday night we did the unthinkable!!!  I did not have them clean up the living room/playroom before bedtime!!!  They looked at me in total disbelief!!!  I said "when the cats' away, the mice will play" and got to explain that saying.  They giggled all the way to bed.  Wednesday night every single thing was back in its place ... better than usual!  Even the flip flops were lined up.

I'm thinking of having Mr. 5 year old do his own laundry.  Including folding and putting away.  This kid changes his clothes a million times a day.  We tried giving him a basket to put his clothes in so he could wear them more than 27 minutes.  

Good Night!

AUGUST TUESDAY

Last week flew past.  Started with a toothache on Fri night, which I kept at bay til Monday morning.  Only to learn my Dentist was on vacation for a week.  I called his replacement and they could fit me in on Tuesday.  What's one more day of 3 Aleve three times a day?  That morning I woke up and felt fine!  So I called to cancel.

Wednesday morning the pain was back and YES they fit me in.  Pushing on the tooth didn't hurt.  Cold didn't hurt.  Heat (did he brand me????) didn't hurt.  Xrays showed a tiny spot that could be the start of an infection but he thought my body would heal itself.  And so it did!

Had a meeting that night and I may be running for the Board of the WLLO Village.  It's a two year term so despite my miserable time on the HOA Board, I feel better knowing we are ALL new.  Stay tuned.

Mom and Dad left for Sea Glass beach in Port Townsend, WA.  I took the boys to a shop that has old toys but mostly out of their price range.  So they got to build their own Lego figurine ...

An hour of fun for just $3.99 per boy.  Next was a stop to a thrift store but no luck finding toy soldiers or Legos there.  Wendy's for lunch was unanimous!

Until he stole my chili!

 We drove to a new shave ice place, parallel parked only to learn they are closed on Mondays.  Big Lots was next on the list and the Halloween stuff was amazing (and noisy and gruesome).  They found a GI Joe type figure with lots of accessories.  We went to Starbucks drive-thru for frappuccinos for the boys to replace shave ice, cold brew for me and came home for a swim.  The water is almost too warm!

They finally got an hour of screen time while I cleaned the dining table and started on our first vignette .... summer on Whidbey Island (sorry, computer cord in the right bottom corner.

We were lucky enough to have leftover pasta with warm bread, salad, fresh English peas (raw) and sesame seeds.  Watermelon for dessert.  Gramma used too many dishes so I think tomorrow is a one plate meal!

FACEBOOK

In just 15 years it seems like Facebook has entered every home on the planet.  Well, at least they have 2.38 BILLION active users.  And they host the good, the bad and the ugly.

I admit I browse through Facebook several times a day.  Luckily, I've been reconnected with childhood friends, gotten closer with quite a few cousins and enjoy family photos of them all.  Since I've joined the WLLO Village, I post twice a day to that page.  I get to wish happy birthday or congratulations to many people as I rarely send a snail mail.  This is all part of the GOOD.

The BAD is all the negativity.  Politically mainly.  It irritates me  when someone posts things that are NOT true.   Are they just too lazy to check?  Or are they posting in hopes of changing someone's mind about how they will vote?  Sometimes, I alert them that the post is not true, argue back and forth for a while ... and then they say "well this is how I think".  Hmmm.  So that makes it true?

Usually I just post "this is not accurate" and leave it at that.  I've joined some groups and pages that are inspiring and upbeat and some just because they are funny!  There are also a few videos I get notified about .... Mike Rowe, Ellen and Claire Crosby ... a now 6 year old with the most wonderful voice and a personality to match.  I get chills every time I listen to her.  The whole family is amazing.

UGLY.  Posting photos and verbiage of mass murderers.  Do NOT give them any publicity.

In my humble opinion.

141 DAYS

Do you feel like retailers are skipping holidays just to start setting up for the next celebration?  We hardly get to enjoy the 4th of July because Halloween is already being advertised.

When I had the big house, there was a long, narrow sofa table at the top of the stairs.  Each month I would decorate and each year I would add something new to that month.  Even when Kate was in high school, she loved having that table.  Luckily, it was near an outlet so there were always tiny lights.

I have a friend who starts setting up Christmas right after Halloween.  Fortunately, I get invited over a few times every month so I get to enjoy the festive feeling early.  They also have a fire in the fireplace EVERY day, even in the summer if the temps go below 70.  SO cozy having a glass of wine and solving the world's problems.

I like to set up Christmas after Thanksgiving and keep it up til mid-January.  Everyone has a different way of doing things.  The Spy Elves don't come out till December 1.

Our condo has a bar height divider between kitchen and dining area, but I don't feel comfortable decorating there because of water and other stuff being splashed.  I think I'm going to start a monthly scene on the far side of our dining table.  Believe it or not, we RARELY all have meals at the same time.  Usually the boys have theirs earlier but I think this school year, I am going to sit with them whether I eat at that time or not.  They are in the habit of watching a movie together (which the love, of course) so maybe just during the weekend they can continue that tradition.

ENHANCED GRANDPARENTING

The NYT had an interesting article last week entitled Intensive Grandparenting.

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/23/well/family/when-grandparents-help-hold-it-all-together.html  (In case you want to read it)

It was filled with lots of woe about grandparents commuting 2 hours to spend the day babysitting then commuting home making for a 10-12 hour day. Another woman gave up her life in another state to move closer to help out.  Some grandparents do lots of housekeeping and even mow the lawn.

The word INTENSIVE just has a negative connotation to me.  So I looked it up.

in·ten·sive

/inˈtensiv/     (adjective)

concentrated on a single area or subject or into a short time; very thorough or vigorous.  Thorough, in-depth, concentrated, rigorous, exhaustive ... 

Synonyms of intensive

acute, almighty, blistering, deep, dreadful, excruciating, explosive, exquisite, fearful, fearsome, ferocious, fierce, frightful, furious, ghastly, hard, heavy, heavyduty, hellacious, intense, keen, profound, terrible, vehement, vicious, violent

Contemporary grandparenting should be voluntary and reassessed every couple of months.  As well as be flexible as we perennials feel tired or worn down.  While we are not like the 65 year old grandparents WE had, we still have some limitations.

I rather like the term "enhanced" grandparenting  It sounds more positive .... like we are enjoying our level of grandparenting rather than fulfilling a commitment.  For me, anyway, I volunteer to help and am RARELY asked to watch the boys.  I can only do housework when the parents are away!  They always thank me and say "you didn't have to do that".  Yes, I know.  Which is why I like to help out when I can.  I am overly appreciated.

Embrace your vocation of being a grandparent.